I call my lawn tractor Sitwell.

That’s because he sits around pretty well as opposed to riding around and, uh, mowing. He is an expensive piece of equipment.

Sitwell lives to sit around. In fact, just recently, he was one of the factors in the big lawn mowing fiasco that could only be accomplished by two men and a Sitwell mower. He sat out. They mowed with the John Deere push mower. And not well, I should add.

sitwell.jpg Please note that the grass has been mowed AROUND Sitwell. The mower needs his own mower.

As it turned out, the problem with Sitwell that time was his mower blade was bent, for some unfathomable reason, after a short drive with my 17-year-old son.

But after paying $398 to get the mower repaired and tuned up, I was dismayed, to say the least, when Sitwell decided to do another sitdown. After driving a mere 11 yards, the whole mowing deck landed flat on the ground bringing the mower to a screeching halt. That comes to about $36.18 per yard of mowing or $12.06 per foot of mowing.

I really can’t afford a Sitwell mower.

And because I was faced with another four hours of push mowing and raking because the push mower doesn’t have a mulching attachment, I was a wee bit put out. Okay, I am facing another business trip and tight deadlines, so I was even more than a “wee bit put out” when I called the mower man to come and cart Sitwell off to the hospital again.

Poor mower man. I reckon that this fellow doesn’t often encounter a woman as tall as I am in full dudgeon about her mower. After I gave myself the old “Robin, get a life” chat, I explained the reason for my pique—Sitwell is a slacker and I am tired of push mowing the lawn. This simply isn’t humorous anymore.

See, as you can see, Sitwell has a history of getting into trouble. He has no stamina at all. I need a mower with a bit more staying power—some umph!

sitwell2.jpg Another Sitwell moment from history

Well, it also occurs to me that it’s come to this. I am now writing about my riding lawn mower as if it were interesting.

Signing off now to go get a life.

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18 Comments

  • […] unknown wrote an interesting post today onHere’s a quick excerptOkay, I am facing another business trip and tight deadlines, so I was even more than a “wee bit put out” when I called the mower man to come and cart Sitwell off to the hospital again. Poor mower man. I reckon that this fellow doesn’t … […]

  • Christine says:

    I also have a 17 year old son, and you say yours broke the mower? No way (huge grin on face)!! I can actually simpathize, we’re mowing our half block with two push mowers while our rider waits for his second trip to the Dr, too.

  • Diana says:

    Robin – it’s ok. I was chasing a lizard down the driveway with a camera today. Pretty much on par with photos and dialog with Sitwell!!! At least we’re in good company. Sorry ’bout your mower woes.

  • Layanee says:

    Once again, what you really need is an ‘Equipment Manager’. You made me chuckle with this post but then that is not unusual.

  • Gail says:

    Oh, I can sympathize…I have run over rocks in my lawn and disabled the blade. How did the rock get there? Worked its way up?

    I enjoyed this post and your fine sense of humor!

    Gail

  • But, Robin, it is interesting. And far better to write about Sitwell than serious news. I think the networks have that covered. LOL.

    I’m lucky I have a repairman at home as our rocky, hilly home will kill a mower and turn it into Welldead rather quickly.

    We’ve bent the mower blades, broken the mower deck, knocked off the belts. Shall I go on? No? Well, I feel your pain.~~Dee

  • Maybe you just need to wax up the mower you have, give it a nice shine so it will feel good about itself, and then it will mow better? Ummmm, wait, check that, I think I need to join in that line for getting a life.

    Signing off to go finish mowing my own lawn…

  • RuthieJ says:

    Robin, how many acres do you mow?
    We went to our local John Deere dealer to get something with a heavy duty mower deck and is designed to deal with rough terrain. It’s a lot more money, but I mow approximately 4 acres a week (for about 5 months each year) and I’ve been riding the same John Deere for three years now with no problems. Even when I drive too fast and run into trees and over stumps, John Deere keeps on going! I’ve never even broken a belt. It’s a good investment compared to the frustration of a broken mower and having to mow by hand.
    Allis Chalmers and Kubota make good heavy duty riding lawn mowers too.
    Good luck to you!

  • Jen says:

    I hope no one ever sells me a Sitwell! I do feel your pain but your wit cracks me up. Good luck with your mower.

  • Brenda Kula says:

    Well, every aspect of our lives should be interesting. And yours, my dear, is also! You do tell a funny story. So it’s all in the telling. Not the subject matter. This post makes me glad I have Alfonzo, the neighborhood yard man, do my grass on the side and in front. And my precious side is all mine. No lawn, and pretty gardens with walkways and gravel. I’m glad I don’t have a “sitwell.” Good luck!
    Brenda

  • Bonnie says:

    Oh, I love my riding lawn mower. I put on my ipod and there I go, whizzing across the lawn belting out songs at the top of my lungs. My son’s too young to mow the lawn and therefore too young to break the mower. Although he does love to come to the shed and climb up and pretend to drive it. Practicing for future possibilities, I guess.

  • Angela says:

    Hey – I write about my mower JD all the time!

    For the best riding lawn mowers – John Deere and Kubota. And I use my JD to get up and down a 50 degree incline at my ditch. If it can haul my fat a** up and down that – imagine what it could do for you!

  • Robin, I had a thought. Bill and I think that the mower repairman didn’t tighten the mower deck after he replaced the blades. We believe Sitwell’s latest hospitalization is due to malpractice.~~Dee

  • eliz says:

    Ha. My parents had a rider mower and we played with it during a house party once. It was never the same.

  • Robin says:

    Robin, everything you write about is interesting! You do know how to tell a story, girl!
    I hope you get your mower up and running soon.

  • Kim says:

    Maybe you should try talking to Sitwell again; Give him a good pep talk… or just threaten him with a newer model! See you soon. Can’t wait to get some real country dirt on my hands again!

  • bs says:

    your blog. it is hilarious. i second the malpractice comment, though i never had a riding mower. if you can believe it, i have so little grass i’m getting by with kitchen shears. but my parents had the car repaired once upon a time, and the mechanic actually put the gas tank back in upside down, so it said it was always full.