October 19th, 2012
I used an online random number generator to pick the winner of the $50 Lowes gift card. The giveaway goes to Kelly, another mom of two Papillons, Betsy and Ella. Congratulations Kelly!
My brother actually won the first round. But his comment wasn’t even the kind of loving comment I told all my Facebook friends to leave. I even gave an example, in case he needed it. But no. What do I get instead?
“Roses are rose, violets are violet. Bacon.”
I am not cleaning up his punctuation. And I’m not sending him a gift card either. He deserves other types of gifts, like the straight jacket I sent him for Christmas one year. Or the horse head in the bed he actually sent me one year.
You can learn more about my brother by following the links on this post.
(Love you, bro.)
Posted In: Humor
January 4th, 2009
The Christmas holiday saw the continuation of the loving gift exchange between me and my younger brother, Dale.
Over the years, we have exchanged taxidermy frogs, poo-themed gifts, concrete nose-picking trolls, bowls of coal, straight jackets and human-figure knife holders. This year, I lamely returned the bowl of coal Dale sent a few years ago, prompting him to ask if I had given up or if this meant he was supposed to return the coal to me again next year.
Dale’s gift had me in tears. Here it is…
Yes, that’s what you think it is. A horse head, as in The Godfather.
This gift got a lot of mileage. Aside from making my sides hurt from laughing, I got to sneak it into my brother-in-law’s bed over the Christmas holiday. Somehow, he knew who did it.
Dale wins…this year. But I haven’t thrown in the towel. Just wait, little bro.
P.S. A number of people have asked where my brother got the horse head. It’s available several places on the internet, including here.
Posted In: Humor