I Am at the Mercy of an Extortionist

Wonder where I’ve been?

Well, between that wretched cold, business travel and generally trying to keep my head above water, I have been the victim of extortion.

See this sweet little dog? She may look innocent. She’s not. She’s my extortionist.

The Extortionist, Sarah

Here’s how she operates:

She scratches at the door to go outside. I figure, “Sarah needs to go potty.”

I take her outside–in the freezing cold. She sniffs. She observes the beautiful sky. She wanders around and scratches at the ground.

Nothing. Nada.

We go back inside. A short while later she scratches at the door.

“You didn’t do anything last time.” More scratching. “You’re gonna poop on my floor if I don’t take you outside, aren’t you?”

Innocent look. (See above photo.)

More scratching at door.

We go outside. She sniffs some more. Looks around. Wanders around.

Repeat this scene about 20 times during an eight-hour period, each time with Little Miss Innocent threatening to poop on my hardwood floors.

See what I have to put up with around here? It’s a wonder I get anything done in the wintertime.